Protect Yourself from Predators

A top headline news story coming out of Idaho this past week involves the death of Idaho resident Sue Newby. Her husband, Mark Newby committed suicide when the police were closing in on him while investigating the suspicious death. Ada County Sheriff’s deputies had reason to believe the death was not, as reported by Mr. Newby, an accident, in part due to evidence of an affair and a motive of financial gain.

The Idaho Statesman (www.idahostatesman.com) reported:

‘On April 2, Sue Newby told a friend she planned to take a horse ride with her husband and confront him about a suspected affair.

On April 4, she was dead in the bottom of Rocky Canyon north of Eagle.
What happened that day may never be known. Mark D. Newby, 46, killed himself with a gunshot to his head late Wednesday, say Ada County sheriff's deputies who discovered the body when they arrived at his home with a search warrant as they investigated Sue Newby's death.’

Friends and family of Sue were suspicious of the death from the onset, as were several horse enthusiasts who said the details of the “accident” didn’t make sense. They rightfully encouraged law enforcement to dig deeply into this case, and to the credit of the investigators, they did. They quickly developed sufficient probable cause to obtain a search warrant for Newby’s residence.

The point of my writing though is not to dwell on the circumstances which led to Sue Newby’s tragic death, but to offer some occasionally overlooked advice for women in potentially vulnerable situations.

In this case Sue Newby told friends she planned to confront her husband about a suspected affair while the two of them were horseback riding in a remote area; this was not a good idea. She should have confronted him at home or in a public place with just enough privacy for a conversation, not an otherwise unattended act of violence or murder.

In my 21 years with the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department, I had the misfortune to see worse-case endings similar to this in many cases. The common denominator was often that the victim placed herself in a vulnerable situation. Linda Sobek was a model who was murdered in 1995 by photographer Charles Rathbun at a remote photo shoot. Rathbun had attempted to rape Sobek before murdering her and reporting her death as an accident. This is one of the more notorious cases of which I am reminded, but there are many others that come to mind. And although these two cases are markedly different, there remains a common denominator of vulnerability.

What should be known to all women, young ladies and even boys is that predators come in all sizes, shapes, social-economical and ethnic classes; they represent all professions (yes, even law enforcement), religious sectors (remember the Catholic priest scandals?) and recreational groups (scouting groups, team sports, etc.). Their prey most often have the common denominator of vulnerability in a variety of ways too many and complex to discuss in this article. The real point is this: Since predators fit so neatly into society before and often after striking out at their prey, it is imperative that we do not allow ourselves or our loved ones to become prey.

The following are a few suggestions in protecting ones self:

If your daughter or girlfriend (or you) is planning to meet someone with whom she has established an internet relationship, a very common occurrence these days, encourage (actually, insist!) her to meet him in a safe and neutral environment. (I say neutral because it is equally important she not reveal her residence to someone she knows nothing about.) Have an exit strategy in the event things do not go as planned, and always tell someone trustworthy where you plan to be and when you expect to be finished.

If your son, daughter, friend or sibling is involved in sports or other recreational activities, don’t assume the “adult” in the situation is trustworthy. Never allow him or her to be alone with the “coach” and remember there is safety in numbers.

If you or your best friend are having trouble in a current relationship and plan to break it off or confront the significant other, do so in the manner previously described for meeting someone for the first time. Also, as in that case, have a simple yet effective exit strategy and be prepared to implement it at the first sign of trouble.

Finally, seriously consider having background checks of strangers you are considering dating or allowing access to your children or loved ones. Remember, these are very different times than generations past when everyone in a community knew everyone else, and seldom did their social circles extend beyond that community. Technology has shrunk our world, and for all of its good, there are plenty of underlying evils.

To Catch a Cheater

To Catch a Cheater

Your instincts tell you he’s cheating. Your girlfriends say confront him, follow him, check his phone and email; threaten him with physical violence . . . Okay, skip the violence unless your calendar is open for the next few years. Forget trying to follow him yourself, but do check his cell phone records and email. (Doing your own surveillance is rarely successful and more often tips him to your suspicion.)

It’s really about opportunity. If you narrow your focus to the mostly likely times of opportunity, you’ll be more likely to find the evidence to back up your instincts. Also, if you’ve decided to hire a private investigator, you can save yourself a lot of money by targeting these highly suspicious times of opportunity. Here are some of the more common cover stories of cheaters:

“I have to go out of town on business."

- This is a great opportunity for all the obvious reasons and should certainly be a time you consider deploying surveillance. If that isn’t an option, make notes of this time period and be sure to study phone records when you receive your next bill. Look at calls before, during and after the trip. Check phone numbers on Google; you may be surprised how many phone numbers will show up in a search as they’ve been listed on websites such as Linked In, Manta, etc. Remember, if you are unable to identify the owner of a phone number, a private investigator may still be able to.

“Honey, I’m headed to the gym.”

- This is a great opportunity for one simple reason: he or she can return home showered—meaning their bodies are void of incriminating scents and other evidence without raising a lot of suspicion. They may also feel empowered by being able to look you in the eyes and say they had a great workout; maybe they did!

“I’m working late tonight.”

- We all know the dangers of workplace romances, but the question is whether your significant other is really working late at the office or has he or she slipped off for a little fling? Time it and call an hour later. Is he still in the office? Is he answering his cell phone? If not, is there a legitimate reason why? If you suspect something is going on, this is another great time for surveillance. Other considerations would be monitoring his odometer to see if the miles add up to his commute, or placing a tracking device on his vehicle. Most private investigators can provide this service. Some people have businesses where they can actually have their affair at their place of employment! This is a whole other challenge but depending on the circumstances of your case, a competent investigator should have several suggestions.

“We’re going fishing . . .”

- Hunting, hiking and fishing trips can be a great cover for a weekend with the other man or woman. For one, oftentimes the trip is planned for an area where cell phone service is unavailable. This allows them to turn off the phone and not worry about having to lie to you all weekend. Again, surveillance would be best. Check the odometer and ask plenty of questions. What about photos? Didn’t he take some pictures? Wouldn’t most people have a digital camera in their pack for their prize catch or that beautiful view?

“My girlfriend, Amanda . . .”

- Let me pick on the girls here a bit. I’ve seen more than a couple flings of women where their cover story is simply their girlfriend. If the “Girls Night Out” evenings or weekends are too common, pay attention. The mention of a Tupperware party makes a man’s eyes glaze; what a perfect cover story that could be! If they leave you with the remote, a pizza and plenty of beer, either be suspicious or thankful!

As a final note let me say this: Sometimes your instincts are wrong! I have worked a few cases where after a couple nights of surveillance I’ve been convinced the alleged cheater isn’t that at all. Maybe insecurities are causing false suspicions, or maybe you are unfairly judging your guy by your last guy or other men. Having said that, I’ve found that in those instances, the client thought the knowledge I provided was a worthy investment for their peace of mind. But if you’re going to rely on an investigator’s report and opinion in this regard, make sure you’ve hired a reputable, competent and reliable investigator.

For more information on the services of Idaho Private Investigator Danny R. Smith, please visit his website at: www.drsinvestigations.com

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Danny R. Smith
DRS Investigations, LLC
Boise, Idaho
www.drsinvestigations.com